Race 10 is finished no Yellow Brick to view as a distraction first thing on waking up … That means one thing – next time I will be part of the YB story not watching from the sidelines. Heart rate all fluttery.
This morning I handed my passport in so that makes me – on paper at least – part of Jamaica’s crew.
On the way to the boat ran into Nell, Andy, Heggie + Chris Viz from Jamaica. Only Nell was chipper, the chaps still decidedly weary from the sailing. We talked about this + that, about the lack of the much longed for rolling seas of the Pacific, about being in the wrong place at the wrong time + Adam being washed man overboard by a wave + being battered + bruised but not thankfully lost in the sea. It is surprising how matter-of-fact such drama seems to the participants when they have lived the story – not even headline news, just one of a number of asides. Surviving, it seems, in the end comes down to commonsense – and not being in the wrong place at the wrong time (nobody said that last bit, but I thought it).
In fact low keyness is a trait displayed by all of those I have met who have previously raced. Drama? We smile knowingly in the face of drama.
Understated cool or no – getting to this point seems to have taken an eternity and right now I just want to get started.
By the end I want to feel I have done my bit + been a successful crew member.
It was one of the many criticisms leveled at me that I did things for people and not with people. That hurt so much, wanting to be on the inside but decidedly feeling otherwise.
I want to prove to myself that I can do this + maybe I am good enough …